Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Head Scratchers and Funnies

Not sure what to post as I fill time waiting on a nudge on a full. For non-writers, a nudge on a full means that an agent requested the full manuscript of my finished story, but hasn’t yet got back to me with a rejection or The Call. I waited ten weeks, and then sent a nudge email. It’s tricky, because you have to keep the nudge confident, but not cocky. You don’t want to sound whiny or needy. It’s kind of a fine line between being a pest and having the right to some closure on the whole thing.

Anyway, here are some funnies things that happened at work. I wish I had pictures to go with them. Please use your imagination.

A small girl eagerly waved me over to her line one morning before school started. She had something to show me. I expected the usual such as a much too close-up view of her gum where she lost a tooth, or the old favorite ‘it’s my birthday’, the ever amazing ‘I got a haircut’, or maybe the thrilling ‘these are my new shoes’. Instead, she pulled forth from her backpack a pink balloon. She proceeded to blow it up using only her— gasp—NOSE. Needless to say, I was enchanted with her undeniable skill and, truthfully, proud she wanted to show me. Ever tried it? She has a lot of lung power.


During a social studies lesson in the not too distant past, we were studying the fact that people live in different types of structures. The teacher began to quiz the class about what kind of homes they lived in, apartments and houses being the expected response. One little girl lived with her grandma, and she was having trouble with the question. She didn’t quite understand. “Does your grandma live in a house or an apartment,” the teacher asked. Completely straight-faced the tot replied, “My mom says grandma lives at the casino.” There you have it folks, social studies can be hilarious.


I once shared a school year with a pair of fascinating twin boys. Like a lot of twins, they were pretty small, making them even cuter. One was in my classroom and the other twin had a teacher across the hall. One day we noticed “Brian” limping. You get a lot of wardrobe problems in kindergarten. Shirts turned wrong-side out or backwards, jeans that won’t button, even (believe it or not) jeans on backwards (ouch). Of course, we see a lot of shoes on the wrong feet. This looked like a case of shoes that needed to be switched. I looked closer, trying to judge. Brian’s feet continued to puzzle. Both of his shoes curved in the same direction. How could that be? I’d never seen the like. He had on two left shoes. Brother in the other room had on two rights. Is that a case of two wrongs don’t make a right?